2018-11-30

PIICRON – Join the revolution!

Tio år senare är det fortfarande oklart vad det gick ut på. Ett avancerat skämt eller en ovanligt ogenerad/korkad bluff? Eller kunde familjen Pramer, mot alla odds, verkligen mena allvar..?

För att försöka sammanfatta: I september 2008 förkunnade ett företag i Malmö att de skulle lansera en serie spelkonsoller som
  1. var kompatibel med alla andra system som fanns och någonsin funnits – "capable of playing quite literally any game ever released to any console"
  2. hade synnerligen väl tilltagna specar – flaggskeppet Ubercron 31337 hade tre Blu-ray-spelare och levererades med åtta kontroller, etc
  3. kostade en bråkdel av vad de borde.
Bakom detta tekniska, finansiella och juridiska underverk stod tre bröder och deras mamma. Av deras resumeer framgår att deras samlade relevanta kompetens var noll. Allt presenterades på sprudlande entusiastisk svengelska. Det är svårt att sluta räkna upp underligheter. Ta en titt på archive.org:www.piicron.com.
Why should I buy any of your consoles?! I can use my PC & emulators to play old games.
The vast majority of people are idiots, as in total idiots. Most would not be able to do just that if their lives depended on it, great many know not even what it means & some have never heard of it, tho they love to game casually. An interesting thought, how did you manage to emulate all consoles for the last two generations perfectly? All by yourself? Need a job?
In some countries compatibility with some consoles will initially be disabled through software to avoid (although every line of code is & will be completely legal in all aspects) lawsuits. As quickly as possible full compatibility will be activated in all regions for all consoles. Our competition is known for playing dirty & they will have no higher desire than to bury us in unfounded legal expenses, a shady but effective tactic, against most. We just need to be ready, we will not falter!
Think what every $1 turned into for Google & H&M, ROI growths we plan to surpass! Care to see your $ multiply by a thousand by 2012? That would mean $1's become 1 000's, 1 000's become millions & millions become billions, to put things into perspective. You like that thought? That is exactly what our projections indicate & that is what our plans are. We are not in it for the money, but if it was not for the money we would not be in it.
Your saliva is to flow when you start croning, regardless if you bought no games with it, or all available.
Man lade också upp ett öppet forum. Det verkar tyvärr inte ha arkiverats men sparade småbitar indikerar att folk drev hämningslöst med Piicron-familjen.

Efter några dagar ställdes revolutionen in:
All invested money will be refunded to their investors in full. We thank all those around us & in the community who have expressed as well as shown their belief in us. We will not forget you.
Slår man på Piicron idag hittar man en optiker i Järfälla.

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